I Know Who You Are.

Me : *a lil nervous* Hello, Good Afternoon sir.

Him : *neutral tone* Hello

Me: * Ok here goes* Sir, My name is Tejal blah blah . I'm one of the trainees at your Summer Intern-ship 2011 programme blah blah blah blah. More blah blah blah.

Him : *half amused, half smiling* I know who you are.

Me : * Flabbergasted*
         *Gulps*
         Umm I had sent you a mail sir, that there would be some delay in my joining date. *erm*

Him :  *Matter-of-factly* Yeah I think so. Yes.

Me : Oh you got it then. I was just calling to confirm. So I'll join on 1st July sir.*still flustered*

Him : *Calculative smile* (yes, you can make out different kinds of smiles over phone. At-least, that's what I think :/ )
         Yeah okay. No problem. Come on Friday.
         *Amused smile*


Sigh. Excerpts from my first phone conversation with my Senior Training Co-ordinator.

Not so soon.

So you thought I'd be gone by now. Haha. That's what I thought too. I was supposed to leave on the 25th but the day before that my brother decided to fall very ill with Jaundice and hence my mom and dad  couldn't possibly leave him suddenly so my trip was postponed for five days. All the tickets were re-scheduled and just like that, I wasn't going the next day.

Sometimes we think that we know what's going to happen, that we can plan ahead, decide our own fate but we fail to realise, the reins of life are just not ours to control. Like I've mentioned previously, I dont doubt the existence of a super-power, I just dont understand his ways.

So here's to expecting nothing and always being brave enough to let anything and everything go wrong. After all, In Murphy, We Trust :)

About Me.

Can you define yourself? Look at the extreme left upper corner of this blog and you'll find that I can't. There's no 'About Me' description there. Because I don't really think I know how to define myself yet. Of-course that's kinda lame because I know 'me' for the past 21 years and its quite peculiar to have known someone for so long and not know well enough about that person. But its true. I can't say that I'm this and I'm not that. Not yet. I may be this and that. Infact, due to this, I keep wondering as to how I'll introduce myself to people that I'll meet in about 10 days.

Should I be like- "Hello, My name is Tejal. I'm 21. Scorpio. No nonsense types. Also, a little weird and extremely random."

So, like I said, I'm leaving in 10 days.I dont really know how I'll react to things there.I mean I hope I'll be positive and happy and try to adjust etc etc but I cant really say anything for sure. Going and living in a new city all by myself is a risky step and I guess that's the charm of it. I really want to explore new things but mostly importantly I want to explore myself, how I'll react to the new things, leaving behind the cosy comfort of a protected life at home.

I don't know what exactly I want them to think of me. 'Them' being the completely new people that I'm going to work with and stay with for the next six months. I mean of-course, I'll "be myself" but its very difficult to do that, you know. Especially because I think I have many versions of me and that too,quite drastic ones. 

Sometimes I'm this docile, timid creature and sometimes I'm this extrovert, enthusiastic person.I also have this constant need to organize things.Yet my room is always messy. Like always. I love details. I practically plan everything to the very last detail and I'm so careful and concerned about everything. I mean, for once I'd like to see what being impulsive would feel like, what carefree-ness, happy-go-lucky-ness would feel like. Because I'm the opposite of impulsive and everything rash. I have this master plan for life and things that I'm doing just are means to get to the goal. So everything is complicated. But now, I don't want that any more. I want things to be simple. To live in the moment. But I'm not sure I can do that. In fact I don't even know how to do that.

In a way, I think I can relate to Monica. I have this obsession to be organized, to make plans, to make lists, to work things out before-hand, to categorise, to synchronise and to co-ordinate. Also, I'm bossy and "freakishly strong". I'm not that much of a neat-freak but then I stare hard at people who litter and my friends are tired of finding dustbins to throw their chocolate-wrappers in. Excuse me, but how can we keep the whole freaking Earth clean if we keep throwing stuff here and there and live amongst trash? I mean, hello? How hard is it, to throw garbage in a bin and not on the road or a side-walk? Anyway, so that's an irritating habit of mine. I also like to tell people what to do and mostly I'm right about it too. Sigh. I have OCD, dont I? 

But I'm also a a wee bit like Phoebe. I'm a lil strange, neurotic and can sing random songs at any given time and/or place! I'm high on life and have a flair for the melodrama. Hmm.

I read somewhere that if you're a non-smoker, a non-drinker and a vegetarian then you hardly have a life. Is that how people define fun? Then I'm totally boring. Lol. No drunken fiascos to boast about. I also happen to love my lungs a lot. And I'd rather not eat anything that was walking and talking a few hours ago. Thank you very much :/

I'm also, much to people's surprise (hmph), single. I think I've written enough about my single-hood and how I like it this way and the fact that I'm okay with it. Its not like the end of road, you know. Apparently, nowadays if you're single, some thing is wrong with you.Sigh. I'm perfectly fine and awesome. Thanks for the concern *rolls her eyes*.

So there you go. That was a LOT "about me". Now how am I supposed to fit in all this and more in a tiny little space and then expect you to know me?

. 

All Talk.

Everywhere you go, everything you see, its all talk. Just talk. I write this, typing away to glory, near my window, alone, but in reality, all I'm doing is talking, to you. You meet somebody, anybody and all you want to do, is talk.  
Ever thought about how much you talk to yourself? Everything we do, atleast everything I do, is about what our mind tells us to do. Literally.
Smiles talk.
Tears talk.
Actions talk.
Eyes talk.
Moments talk.
Sometimes everybody talks, all at once, but you dont want to listen. You want to shut it all out. Cause the voice that you actually want to hear, is always silent.

The Warrior Princess.

Dear Baby Xena,

First of all, I would like to welcome you to this world. Its a crazy crazy place but I'm sure you'll like it here. I'm sorry I'm a lil late in the welcoming bit but its only because I didn't know about you until recently. So obviously I'm very excited and thrilled to have you among us. "Us" being your virtual well-wishers and basically your mom's virtual gang of drunken folks. We're high on life, mind you. By the way, drinking is a very bad thing, Xena *ahem*.

So what's up with you,eh? I hear you've been really active during your stay in the hospital. Giving those doctors and nurses a run for their money. Good job girl. Somebody has to make those people sit up and think a little. I mean what's the fun in being the regular boring case, right? I like you already, we'd make an awesome team. By the way, causing trouble is a very bad thing, Xena *ahem*.

But you know what? Be a lil easy on Mom and Dad ok. 'Cause they're basically nice people, you know. Your mom might occasionally be a lil bollywood-crazy and you might not find some of your dad's jokes ..er.. funny, but they're two of my very favourite people. Infact, I was the President of your dad's Fan club. Bleh, who am I kidding? I still am. So y'know, let them chill once in a while. And if they don't listen to you, tell me, we'll irritate them together. By the way, annoying your folks is a very bad thing, Xena * ahem*.

So there's this new SRK movie releasing soon. SRK is a superhero in it and its releasing on MY birthday!! Yeay! I realllllly want to watch it. You do too, dont you? See, I told you we have a lot in common. I think we should get Aish on our team too *muahahahahah*. We'll meet when you come to visit your naana and naani ok. We'll discuss our plans then. By the way, plotting conspiring planning is a very bad thing, Xena *ahem*.

Xena. I know that the times have been tough but I also know that you have been tougher. I think that you are very brave and so are your parents. Your mom has always been an inspiration to me and she'll always take care of you. Do take care of her too. And you should also know, you are very very lucky and that you are and always will be, absolutely adored by us.

Lots of Love,

President Maasi (a.k.a Choti Maasi)